Jody Dean KLUV

I listen to KLUV at work (because they play alot of Beatles) and I listen to Jody Dean the morning guy. Before he signs off he always does some type of joke or something that he gets from listeners. I've seen this one before. This morning when he was reading it I had a vision that this could be me someday...



Mom's Brownie Recipe

Remove teddy bear from oven and preheat oven to 375.

Melt 1 cup margarine in saucepan.

Remove teddy bear from oven and tell Jr. "No, No."

Add margarine to 2 cups sugar. Take shortening can away from Jr. and clean cupboards.

Measure 1/3 cup cocoa.

Take shortening can away from Jr. again and bathe cat. (Adam and I believe that this would be Connor)

Apply antiseptic and bandages to scratches sustained while removing shortening from cat's tail.

Assemble 4 eggs, 2 tsp. vanilla and 1½ cups sifted flour.

Take smoldering teddy bear from oven and open all doors and windows for ventilation.

Take telephone away from Billy and assure party on the line the call was a mistake. Call operator and attempt to have direct dialed call removed from bill.

Measure 1 tsp. salt, ½ cup nuts and beat all ingredients well.

Let cat out of refrigerator. (Adam and I believe that this would be Satine...since she is an Ice Queen)

Pour mixture into well-greased 9x13-inch pan.

Bake 25 minutes.

Rescue cat and take razor away from Billy. Explain to kids that you have no idea if shaved cats will sunburn. Throw cat outside while there's still time and he's still able to run away.


Frosting

Mix the following in saucepan:

1 cup sugar

1 oz. unsweetened chocolate

¼ cup margarine

Take the darn teddy bear out of the @#$% broiler and throw it away. far away.

Answer the door and meekly explain to nice policeman that you didn't know Jr. had slipped out of the house and was heading for the street. Put Jr. in playpen.

Add 1/3 cup milk, dash of salt and boil, stirring constantly for 2 minutes.

Answer door and apologize to neighbor for Billy having stuck a garden hose in man's front door mail slot. Promise to pay for ruined carpet.

Tie Billy to clothesline.

Remove burned brownies from oven.